Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Don't Mess Around With Vlad

As anyone knows, Vladimir Putin doesn’t tread lightly. Thus, the obviously mentally challenged terrorist group calling itself the Mujahideen Shura Council — the idiots who posted their video of the bloody executions of two of those Russian diplomats kidnapped in Baghdad — are in doo-doo so deep that even the Coalition Forces won’t be able to save them... even if they were inclined to do so.

Of course, per Putin, it’s our fault his diplomats are dead, because if we weren’t there, well, no problemo, right? They could have been carrying on with their oil-for-food corruption without all this malarkey about freedom and elections and associated balderdash (what is the Russian equivalent of “balderdash”?).

The BBC reports the story (and carries a great picture of Putin that is worth clicking the link to see):

Russian President Vladimir Putin has ordered special services to “find and destroy” the killers of four Russian diplomats taken hostage in Iraq.

The head of Russia’s security services immediately pledged to see Putin’s order carried out.


The head of the Federal Security Service (FSB), Nikolai Patrushev, promised to carry out the task “however much time and effort it requires”, Interfax reported.

Separately, the lower house of the Russian parliament approved a statement condemning the killings, and appearing to blame Iraq’s “occupying powers”.

“The whole responsibility for the situation in Iraq, including guaranteeing the security of its citizens, and also foreign specialists, as before lies on the occupying powers,” the statement said.

Meanwhile, back at the Mujahideen Shura Council, what do you suppose the perps are doing? Besides writing out their last wills and testaments, I mean? Americans play by all these silly little rules that don’t impede the Russians and never will. Perhaps they are considering finding some less freshly-stained boxers and cleaning up a bit before throwing themselves on the mercy of the coalition forces? Fat lot of good that will do. Mere walls do not a safe prison make... not when the Russkies are after you.

Somehow, Mr. Putin’s visage brings to mind the unforgettable wisdom of Jim Croce’s admonition:

You don’t tug on Superman’s cape
You don’t spit into the wind
You don’t pull the mask off the old Lone Ranger
And you don’t mess around with Jim Vlad, da do da do...

Start counting the virgins who await you, boyos, ’cause your film careers are over. It won’t be long now until you are the unlamented Mujahideen Shura Council, lately of Baghdad.


Starling said...

Dymphna, here's a copy of a comment I just left at Belmont about this breaking story:

"Not without precedent is Putin's decision to have the perpetrators tracked down and liquidated. The details are fuzzy but I seem to recall that Hezbollah (?) kidnapped and killed(?) a KGB agent in Lebanon in the mid 1980's. The KGB responded by kidnapping a relative of a leader deemed responsible for the kidnapping. Seems I recall the Russians sent the body back in pieces.

Not that I condone this sort of thing but I do think that Russian diplomats/KGB agents were never so molested again in Lebanon.

My first guess is that an even worse fate awaits the murderers of the four Russian diplomats in Iraq.

Perhaps it's a no-brainer but my other guess is that not one of the killers would refuse American custody -or even a stint of undetermined length in Gitmo followed by a military tribunal and execution by firing squad- rather than to face Putin's brand of justice."

When I posted this at BC I hadn't realized the men from Shura had made and released a videotape of their slaughter of one of the Russians. Perhaps the fact the the Mujahideens beet russia in Afghanistan and have done much damage to them in Chechnya has emboldened the Muj fear the Russians less than they ought?

I feel something akin to pity for these men, for the awful fate that awaits them. I wonder if the Russians will make videos of their own. ...Shudder...

Zerosumgame said...

Is this the same Vlad giving Iran the nuclear technology to wipe out the Jews? And then standing in our way of stopping a second Holocaust?

Do you really want to admire him?

Dymphna said...


Change your nic to reflect your reality: call yourself "johnny one-note."

Want to meet someone whose obsession has obliterated any speck of understanding re: irony? Look in the mirror, pal.

THE POST WAS IRONIC. GET IT? You must be a real fun guy at parties.

Jeesh -- you're right up there with the Shura Council when it comes to being able to decipher reality.

Dymphna said...


The pornographic execution videos are surely an Arabic taste, no?

The Russians and the Israelis have this kind of dedicated focus when they set out to exact retribution...or so it would seem. Neither of them seems to do the braggadocio bit that is so popular with the Islamists. In fact, the difference makes the islamists look like what I called them: "boyos" -- I agree with your conclusions exactly, but no videos.

I'll have to visit the thread at Wretchard's to see whassup...



Yes, the Russians are not the behemoths propaganda made them out to be, but they're no one you'd want to meet in a dark alley, either. The Russian mafia in this country makes the Italians look like altar boys.

I agree with Starling: these guys are doomed...what could they have been thinking, grabbing Russian diplomats? Makes you realize they don't get out much.../irony

Megan said...

Aside from Afghanistan (when they were still the USSR) the Russian fighting skills in the early 1900s were vicious, cruel, and effective. I have no doubt that they will capture these monsters. And you will not hear whining from the MSM or UN about how they have committed atrocities. You won't hear a peep. Yet if the US were to merely detain and intern these monsters we'd be accused of torture.

*sigh* The irony is sick.

Fellow Peacekeeper said...

The Russian's arm is not that long, they are nowhere near being the old USSR (case in point : some Chechen leaders with a price on the head and blood on their hands move all bar freely outside Russia). But thats niot really important.

What is more important is the attitude - no hand wringing, no apologies, no Gitmo, no trial, just a promise of remorseless revenge and a clear PUBLIC instruction to the hard men to make it so. Old school politics.

Wally Ballou said...

Dymphna - Putin didn't blame us for the kidnapping, as far as I know, that was the "speaker of the house" over there.

And that story of the Lebanon kidnaping - that was the first thing that came to my mind when the Russians were kidnapped. My father (who was CIA then) told me about it - the KGB kdnaped the terrorist's brother, tortured him to death, and returned him with his privates in his mouth and hs mouth sewn shut. After that, they were left alone - "fanatical" terrorists weigh risks and rewards, just like anyone else.

I don't think we need to be quite like the Russkies, but we could be a whole lot less sensitive about what others say about us.

By the way, Putin is a little odd

eatyourbeans said...

I've always had a soft spot for the Russians, too many Russian novels when I was younger perhaps.
Sentiment apart, a strong, Orthodox and fertile Russia, tied to the West by our common civilization and interests, would sure help me sleep better at night.
On the other hand, we cannot abandon our friends in E. Europe a second time.
Sometimes small gestures pay great dividends: hopefully the Coalition in Iraq will extend every assistance to their Russian guests to assure them good hunting.

Don Miguel said...

I have to second the account by Cato. Years back a friend's father-in-law who worked over there with a certain unnamed agency told me exactly the same thing.

Starling said...

Dymphna, hello. Quick clarification

I didn't think the Russians would have "cameras rolling" for the same purpose as the Islamists do. Though I epxressed it poorly, what came to mind was the numerous pictures I saw in 2000 and 2001 that were (supposedly) from the Russian "filtration" camps in Chechnya. It was pretty gruesome stuff, the kind I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Google "Russia+Chechnya+filtration" for more details.


El Jefe Maximo said...

Re the last commenter: the Russians don't fool with rebels or guerrillas, like the Romans, they make a desert and call it peace.

The only thing that keeps us in the power game is, by comparison with the rest of the world, bottomless resources. It sure isn't our skill or practicality.

What is "Occupation" said...

Dear Mr Putin,

I grieve for your loss of your diplomatic staff, I know that they, now that they have no heads, will not be able to meet and greet with hamas leaders that they had enjoyed many a tea sandwich with. It is sad to see such fine men having to saw off the heads of your staff, after all these fine men most likely have received the finest in russian training and then have to use these same skills to remove russian heads from russian bodies. I makes you wonder if maybe russia should start funding a chechya free of all russians, start paying chechens to rebuild their cities, after all the chechens are just like the palestinians, just seeking justice and freedom.

Mr Puty Put....

blow back sucks dont it?

Fellow Peacekeeper said...

A sad but nasty truth, you play with Islamic loony fundamentalists, sometimes they just up and saw your head clean off just for the sheer hell of it. Kinda like breeding pit bull terriers.

Incidentally AFAIK the islamic snuff video thing began in Afghanistan in the 80s with foreign mujahideen wanting to prove their mettle to the folks back home. There was a black market of soviet captives being traded for big money so some folks could make their snuff videos.