One can be forgiven for picturing a parade of missiles and soldiers marching past a reviewing stand in downtown Brussels, with beefy apparatchiks watching in stolid approval.
Of course, since the EU’s military capability is all but non-existent, the parade would be over blissfully soon, and we could all adjourn to the nearby cafés and drink state-regulated alcoholic products served by barmaids with statutorily restricted décolletage.
Actually, what the authorities are planning is more like a post-modern pop festival, a bread-and-circuses approach to the daunting task of winning back popular approval of the EU:
The celebrations are part of Brussels’ drive to win the public’s sympathy after French and Dutch citizens voted down the EU constitution last year, according to Reuters.
“We have big plans to make the EU more punter-friendly,” one EU official told the agency.
“Punter-friendly”, eh? That’s an interesting choice of word. Instead of the toiling workers of yesteryear, we’ve got punters.
“Punter”, as you may know, is British slang, and means “customer or client, especially of either a bookmaker or a prostitute.” Is that really what the EU means to evoke as the image of a citizen?
Or maybe the celebrants will be out on the canals, poling flat-bottomed boats…
Anyway, to continue:
The campaign begins this month with the launch of a competition to find a logo and slogan for the EU’s 50th birthday.
Well, not to blow my own kazoo or anything, but I’ve already got a logo for you, as readers will remember from yesterday. Simple, but effective! So I’m ready to claim the prize.
As for a slogan, how about “Socialism Without a Face”?
Or maybe we should stick with something tried and true, like “The Will of the Workers is Expressed in Untiring Support of the Production Goals Set by the Party.”
The article continues:
But new member states in particular are reportedly unhappy with the song and dance contest idea.
“They feel people are being forced to dance and sing, like they were by the communists,” said one EU diplomat according to Reuters.
It’s not surprising that the Poles and the Czechs are sensitive to state-managed revelry.
The article concludes with this:
The European Commission has also recently put particular emphasis in its press briefings on issues directly affecting citizens, such as tariffs for mobile phoning abroad and a blacklist of unsafe airlines.
So these are the issues that directly affect Europe’s citizens?
- Not the problem of how to fund their generous pension and welfare system when they only have 1.09 children per couple?
- Not the fact that Islamic barrios in their major cities have become no-go zones for police and emergency workers?
- Not the threat of bodily harm and death against those who speak out against the coming of Eurabia?
Nope. Cell phones and air travel. Cheese and bratwurst. These are the important things!
May I have the next dance, Tovarisch?
Hat tip: EURSOC.