Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Mincing Around in Clogs

El Inglés’ comment on Michiel Man’s essay earlier today reminded me of something…

The Little Dutch BoyI’ve posted this little ditty before, but that was almost three years ago, and a lot of our readership has turned over during that time. Besides, it’s such a wonderful song that it bears repeating.

John Dowie was a progressive British musician and songwriter back in the mid-1970s, which is when this song first appeared. I used to be able to catch it late at night on the local DC progressive FM station WGTB (Georgetown University).

Since the last time I posted these lyrics, I found an MP3 of the song online, and listening to it once again returned me to the halcyon days of my misspent youth.

These lyrics are so naughty and offensive and politically incorrect that I am posting them below the fold, in order to spare the sensibilities of decent folk.
- - - - - - - - -
I Hate the Dutch
by John Dowie


I’m a British Tourist and I’m very, very rude.
I hate the stinking foreigners
hate their stinking food

I don’t like French or Germans
I don’t care for Belgians much
But worst of all worst of all
I hate the Dutch

The Dutch, the Dutch
I hate them worse than dogs.
They live in windmills
and mince around in clogs.

They don’t have any manners
They don’t say ‘thanks’ or ‘please’
all they eat is tulips
and stinking gouda cheese…

I’m a British tourist with a countenance severe
I love to strike the foreign type
And box their poxied ears

But there’s one woggy dago
I cannot bear to touch
The slimy crawling
stench appalling
snotty grotty Dutch

The Dutch are mad
Their fingers stuck in dikes
They use the wrong side of the road
And ride around on bikes

They don’t have any manners,
don’t have any brains.
There’s only one race worse than them
and that’s… THE DANES!

4 comments:

Michiel said...

LOL

-"all they eat is tulips
and stinking gouda cheese…"-

Obviously the writer hasn't sniffed our Limburgher cheese yet. My mother used to bake it. With onions. Our neigbourhood knew the meaning of NBC warfare.

Isn't 'to smell like Limburgher cheese' an American expression?

christian soldier said...

Does this mean that I may be hit -by a Brit....


Since I have the blood
of both
the Dutch and the Danes
Running in my veins?

Bert said...

:))
"But there’s one woggy dago
I cannot bear to touch
The slimy crawling
stench appalling
snotty lefty Dutch"

Felicie said...

Michiel: "Obviously the writer hasn't sniffed our Limburgher cheese yet. My mother used to bake it. With onions."

This sounds delicious! Do you have the recipe or could you just give a general idea of how to do it?