Of Hate Mail and the Hymen Industry

Gates of Vienna doesn’t get much hate mail, so it’s always a thrill to open up a screed that drools down the page. Take this snippet from an epistle in today’s mailbag:

Put simply, I say to you, that you are ignorant, racist, Zionist bastards. My initial quarrel is with your perception of the religion of Islam. As Americans you no doubt have the utmost contempt for anyone who chooses to go against you [sic] screwed up, Nazi culture and live their own way of life. Many or most Americans, in my experience, claim not to be racist since they do not jusdge [sic] based on racial differences. I put it to you that you do, however, discriminate based upon religion and culture. Just because a woman decides to protect her modesty she is being crushed by the ideals of men? Surely if men had their way, and theirs alone, women would go around wearing very little at all.

Now this would have been a stronger essay had he made his opening salvo into a separate paragraph of one eye-catching sentence. Those ad feminemae would have stood taller had they been forced to fire from their own little fortified island at the beginning. As it is though, the subsequent verbiage buries his virile first statement beneath a veritable waterfall of spittled rage and thus peters out. So to speak.

Such a shame they quit teaching children how to write. The Headmistress would never let one of her pupils get away with this kind of essay. Come to think of it, neither would Sister Benignus, not even in her dotage.

So, Mr. Hate Email, a C+ for you — and I’m being kind, at that. You lost points for making one paragraph out of divers thoughts and subjects. In addition, the “you” in front of “screwed up, Nazi culture” would make more syntactical sense as “your screwed up, etc.” Lastly, I’m not certain your ultimate jibe in this paragraph doesn’t tend toward the lewd and lascivious, mentioning as it does scantily-clad women. However, despite the pedestrian style of your screed, we’ll give you the benefit of the doubt there, since you so nicely lead into the real subject of this post, which is hymens — a subject vital to the non-Zionists among us, mostly for reasons of health and safety.

Several weeks ago Planck’s Constant had post up entitled “Why There Are Only 72 Virgins in Heaven.” The title alone intrigued me, given all those thousands of virgin martyrs, men and women, that the Catholic Church is carrying on the books even now. Hmm…were we thinking of the same heavenly space here?

As it turned out, we weren’t. Planck’s Constant had found an MSM article, “Young Muslim women in Europe go to extremes to be virgins — again.” (see his site for the link). This “news” featured the usual MSM victim-seeking missiles, of which the following is an example:

Chastity can exact a painful price from young Muslim women, forced into lies or surgery to go to the marriage bed as virgins. Hymen repair, fake virginity certificates and other deceptions, said to be commonplace in some Muslim countries, are practiced in France and elsewhere in Europe, where Muslim girls are more emancipated but still live under rigid codes of family honor.

Such ploys have saved many a young woman from scorn and worse. But they also clash with the more liberal social mores of France and Europe, where some decry it as an attack on human rights.

Oh, for pity’s sake. Over here in America, with our screwed up Nazi culture, any Muslim woman can sneak into a doctor’s office on her lunch hour and quicker than you can say “laser”, why, zap! hymen restored. Not only that, but she can put it on her credit card or sign up for one of their usurious loan schemes.

Check these sites out, or google your own under “hymen rejuvenation”:

You could try Women’s Liberty Health Care. Here, they lay it on the line—

We perform expert hymen repair surgery (hymenoplasty, hymenorrhaphy) or restoration of the hymenal ring in our clean, comfortable, ultra-modern private OB/GYN office.

The hymenal ring normally gets disrupted after a woman has had sexual intercourse or even after strenuous physical activity or tampon use. Sometimes, for cultural or other personal reasons (for example, an upcoming marriage), a woman would like to restore a more intact, tighter hymenal ring.…( let’s call it what it is, why don’t we? “A life-saving procedure.” Cultural reasons, indeed! How discreet of you, doctor.)

Using a special surgical technique, we can repair and tighten the hymen to a more intact, virgin-like state in most patients. Because of a wide variation among hymenal and vaginal states, we customize the surgery to the individual needs and expectations of the patient, as are discussed during the required pre-surgical consultation and thorough gynecological examination. In most cases, the surgery is virtually undetectable after complete healing, and patients are very pleased with our final results.

My favorite reassurance comes from The Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation Institute of Michigan. Michigan has a very large Muslim population so it is reassuring that they also have a number of Rejuvenation sites. Handy.

Hymenoplasty (reconstruction of the hymen) can repair the hymen as if nothing ever occurred. The Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation Institute is sensitive to the needs of women from all cultures that embrace these particular issues because of cultural, social, or religious reasons.

Now tell me, exactly which “… cultures embrace these particular issues because of cultural, social, or religious reasons”? Name three.

By the way, the “complete healing” mentioned above takes some time, so be sure to schedule your appointment well ahead of the wedding date.

In-laws are not the only hazards of marriage. In some cultures.