Thanks for Nuthin’, Boys

 
What the poll numbers for President Bush don’t tell you is how much of the decline in his approval ratings comes from people to his right. Those of us who thought that Mr. Bush might really change the political culture of Washington D.C., who thought he might rein in spending, who thought he might limit the intrusiveness of government in ordinary peoples’ lives — well, we had another think coming.

Contemplating the craven and profligate behavior of Republicans in Congress, the ordinary grassroots conservative is disgusted. With the exception of the President’s conduct of the war against the Great Islamic Jihad — and even that has had its wobbly moments — there isn’t a dime’s worth of difference between the two parties.

I have argued previously that the only way to effect change in the national GOP is to hit them where it hurts: create a hemorrhage in their beloved supply of cash. Fortunately, we at Gates of Vienna were provided another opportunity yesterday to put our (withheld) money where our mouth is. The following message arrived in our mailbox, with my name on the envelope, but, strangely, someone else’s name and address on the letter inside:

REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE
310 FIRST STREET, SOUTHEAST       WASHINGTON, D.C. 20003       www.GOP.com
SUSAN GAZDO
MEMBERSHIP DIRECTOR

Mr Buddy Dudley
[Redacted address]

Dear Mr Dudley,

I don't want to believe you've abandoned the Republican Party, but I have to ask ... Have you given up?

What on earth might have given you that idea? Could you have possibly acquired a Clue Bag?

Our records show we have not yet received your 2005 Republican National Committee membership contribution.

Your records are correct: don’t hold your breath. You might look in the Clue Bag for the following message:

The world is tilting, and you useless, ineffectual, dithering moneysuckers seem increasingly to be empty suits, given shape and movement not by ideas and a willingness to serve the electorate, but by wispy tufts of ambitious smoke. You seem directed toward nothing more than keeping your almighty Senate or House seat in your name. You give away your power, you give away your advantages in committee, you leave in place utterly feckless people like Arlen Specter and then, when you finally seem like you are on the cusp of doing something productive and right, like investigating the CIA or okaying drilling in a bare, muddily, uninhabitable tundra, you fall into a faint and go slinking back to your states and districts to gladhand and pump for money and then gladhand some more.

Mr Dudley, President Bush is counting on Republican leaders like you to help him with the tough challenges that lie ahead in his second term.

Mr. Bush can’t even count on his Capitol Hill colleagues or his own cabinet; why should he count on me?. His only true allies seem to be his Vice President and his Secretary of Defense, not to mention the soldiers in Iraq laying their lives on the line for his belief in the spread of liberty.

While we strengthened our majorities in Congress, the margin is still narrow -- and that means liberal Democrats will continue their delay and filibuster tactics.

A fat lot of good our “strengthened majorities” did. With RINOs like Arlen Specter on our side, we might as well be campaigning for Joe Biden. As for “delay and filibuster”, would you like to talk about the Gang of Fourteen? With so many turncoats in the current Congress, it’s hard to tell the elephants from the donkeys.

But as we learned during the President's first term, the Clinton/Kennedy/Kerry Democrats will obstruct and delay our agenda at every turn.

Pray tell, what has changed here? Obstruction and delay is not just a Democrat preoccupation.

So if you have delayed in renewing your membership because you feel the RNC has let you down or no longer needs you, please let me know. I need to hear from you.

That’s what this is. I’m putting you on notice. This shameless bunch of invertebrate poll-readers are embarrassing the rank-and-file conservatives. We’re looking for alternatives, and we do not expect to find then at the RNC. We’ve long since quit looking under that rock.

If isn’t already, the Republican establishment should be lying awake at night in a cold sweat thinking about the 2006 primary season. Check out the plans at the Club for Growth.

Just include your comments and suggestions with the enclosed Membership Confirmation and return them with your 2005 membership renewal check.

In summary, Ms. Gazdo,

• Get a Clue Bag.
  
• Look in it early and often. Conservatives, compassionate and otherwise, are already sending you angry, desperate messages. So far, they’re going unread.
  
• Arlen Specter et al. are worse enemies than any Democrat. The political expediency that “required” the President to endorse this specter has come back to haunt him. Sometimes integrity is essential.
  
• See “delay and obstruction.”
  
• Watch the Republican primaries in 2006.
  
• And consider joining a Twelve-Step group to overcome your Pork Addiction.

Please don't quit now! Renew your RNC membership today. Thank you.

Sincerely,

Susan Gazdo
Membership Director

P.S. Our nation is closely divided politically. We need the support of every Republican to provide the resources President Bush and the GOP Congress needs to defeat the liberal Democrats and fully enact our agenda.

“Agenda”??? What agenda? Oh, you mean ladling out the big slimy gobs of pork into every outstretched hand? And then cowering under the bed every time the New York Times or CNN says a disapproving word?

While you’re at it, why don’t you proclaim our renewed friendship with the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, our faithful ally in the War on Terror? What? Oh. You already did…

Please don't give up now. Please renew your RNC membership today. Thank you.

Oh, I won’t give up now. I gave up long ago.

Happy Thanksgiving, RNC. Gobble, gobble! Oink, oink!